drop in dialogue 2

(see note on right sidebar for more info about 'drop in dialogue' posts)

"I just can't stand the pressure of being two people; who I really am and who people think I am."

"Living in shelters is hard; it would be so easy to get trapped in depression and addiction like so many others I see there. I've gone to the temporary job lines every day and waited for three hours before I got sent away. I had no idea it was so hard to get a leg up, even when you're a hard worker."

"Have you ever tried sniffing? You wanna? I'll show you..."

"I think I could maybe go about five days without using, but thats it. And I wanna stop .. but not really."

"It's so hard to believe that God loves me like this"

... I don't write these for shock value.. I take note of these things, these snippets of conversation, because this is where the rubber meets the road in terms of what I believe, in terms of making sense of my faith, in terms of understanding mercy and grace.

... not a single drop in morning goes by that I don't meet the Creator in some unexpected way.. that i don't see something beautiful and fun and inviting in the eyes of people we have this great privilege of spending time with.
... not a single drop in morning goes by when I don't feel convicted about ways I've benefited from unearned privileges while others have not enjoyed the same.
...so far, drop in days turn into questioning days.. questions that start with 'why....?'