immersion

“Your profession is not what brings 

home your paycheck. Your profession is what 

you were put on earth to do with such 

passion and such intensity that it 

becomes spiritual in calling.”     

Vincent Van Gogh

  I asked for a copy of this image as a birthday present.  I can't recall ever asking for a specific thing before. I had seen it in a show 2 years ago - framed with the Van Gogh quote along the bottom - and I was completely captivated by it. The image is actually the cover of a book**, which includes lots of amazing underwater shots -  but what I asked for (and got) was a large, framed copy of the image just by itself. 

Anyway, I don't know what Rod and Sonya of Eve Studios named this image, but what came to mind while I stared at it was 'immersion'. Here is a bit of what it says to me so far...

It speaks to me about living risky and immersed, exposed and vulnerable.  Plunging in anyway, somehow staying on track in spite of yourself.  Knowing that there are costs and being willing to pay them. Looking fear and complacency right in the eye and saying (with intensity and conviction) ' you two are LOUD, but maybe you don't get to have the last word ..." 

I think this image gave me a visual representation I could associate with courageously living differently. I don't always feel that courage, but there ARE times when it is intensely present, brimming over even.

The profession reference in the quote (for me, anyway) speaks to living at and being part of  Flatlanders Inn. As I recall, when I saw this image for the first time, I had recently experienced yet another encounter with someone who looked at me like I had three heads because we choose to live where and how we do. This image gave me a visual - something to rest in and help me feel okay in my own skin and about our choices, okay to be our family -  just the way we are, and to immerse ourselves into something deep and life-altering without guarantees or even the support we sometimes wish we had more of.  We know that what we're doing isn't normal, and we know that many people won't or can't open themselves to something that seems so different.  (It isn't actually that different, but fear and complacency are loud, great convincers for humans!)

At the same time, there is so much grace communicated; its as if the model is suspended in the water. There is a sureness about her that seems out of place. As a viewer, if you've ever been in a swimming pool, you know she can't be suspended, its impossible - you know she's sinking and that her limbs must be moving. It makes me wonder: do our human attempts to do things that feel risky, unstable, like guaranteed failure, things that look just plain ridiculous... do they look this beautiful if captured in a certain moment, through a certain lens or from a certain perspective? Can we be graceful when we feel clumsy, laborious, unsure?  Do faith and trust help the whole thing to appear graceful when its also cloudy and confusing?  Is that part of what it means for calling to be spiritual - that there is a lot of risk and uncertainty in it?

Anyway, as of my birthday last week, I get to be inspired by this image every single day.  The ways to engage with it are endless..... I'm thankful to Lorrie, Lisa, Karen, Bren, Cory, and Bek for all pitching in so that I could contemplate 'immersion' every day!

** Those photo books are still available, by the way, and the proceeds from sales support water projects in the developing world. (Go here for more info if you're interested in the book - i think the shipping is free!)  You can also search out the H2Oohhh exhibit page on Facebook for more info.

major in the majors

 When my kids were small, they attended a nursery school in St. Vital. A few weeks into our first year of school, another mom and I noticed that we seemed to be coming from and going to the same place.  We started to walk together, and a friendship was born, one that continues to this day. It helped that our kids were the same age, and that we lived only two blocks apart at the time.  Our sons went to that nursery school together, and then a couple of years later, our daughters followed.  All those years, we'd walk together, often having play dates before or after school. Many warm coffees were shared, along with laughter and a pretty significant contribution to each other's families.
I just got a birthday note from that friend (Krista) this week, and I was reflecting on one of the most important contributions she made to my life. She taught me about majoring in the majors and letting the minors be minor.  She modelled it and gave me permission to let go of unimportant pressures.
I remember marvelling at how she could make sure the things she valued were part of her daily life and her family.  She completed a nursing degree while balancing a shift work schedule, working many over-nights, and while making sure that her kids were involved in activities that were important to their family.  Because she comes from a family of musicians, her kids have had opportunities to learn to play many instruments over the years.  One of the things that allowed Krista to have time for the things she valued was making do.  She made do by substituting, being open to creative solutions, being willing to change, and keeping her goals in sight.  She'd weigh options about how to spend time, choosing only what lined up with her values. She'd substitute ingredients, majoring in having home baking available for her kids while minoring in presentation or the 'rightness' of it. Fancy, pristine, just-right, or just-so weren't part of Krista's life or experience.  If they had been, she couldn't have done what she did. I loved the snacks that came from her house because they were nutritious and fun - like rice krispie squares that also had cheerios in them. She wouldn't run to the store to get whatever the kids wanted or some special excursion food when we went out together (that's what I did!) - she made do with whatever she had and didn't apologize for it.  Everyday things became craft supplies and creative opportunities - her kitchen walls were lined with a always-rotating array of interesting pictures and projects, and she rarely bought things other than markers or paper.
She was conscious of focusing her energy on what she had chosen to spend it on, and she was genuinely able to let go of demands for her attention/time that didn't line up with her 'important' list.  One day it clicked for me; Krista didn't get caught up in 'supposed to' or 'other's expectations'.   She just lived according to the values she had and the priorities she had set for herself and her family. Period. I think I started to do the same, and I'm so thankful for her influence in my life.

One of the things that attracted me to Flatlanders was that same quality of majoring in the majors and letting the minors be just that ... minor.  This was evidenced in the way we shopped and ate, in our decor and throughout the shared living spaces.  All of our practices rotate around the 'majors' of relationship and community .

The more I live here, the more I realize that we are at risk in the same ways as a family is.  The minors can pretty easily become major and the majors can slip down the list with hardly any awareness ....  all of a sudden, a pattern no one really chose is established and we're all looking at each other saying 'how'd that happen?'

A new year is about to start, and I'm looking at a few things in my life  and community - observing spots where the minors have become major and the majors haven't gotten the attention they should have. And so, I'm going to do a Krista-inspired evaluation and hopefully put things in better order.

picture post

its been a while. Here I am in Caronport again, and I can usually manage to find a little time to post when I'm here at school. I figured I'd give a little picture post of some things lately ...

This is one of our neighbourhood friends, who has created some art.  His work is being displayed in our artspace gallery right now.  The show is called 'Falling Leaves, Flying Geese' and it ends tomorrow.

How Do You View Yourself?

This is my most recent creative piece.  This is what I do when I want to make some sense out of chaos and confusion in my mind.  I am a collector of images and words, I store all sorts of little scraps in a special place.  Then when I need to sort myself out, I put them all out in front of me and find the ones I most identify with at that moment, and consider what is drawing me in ... As this piece came together, I found myself (as is often the case lately) trying to sort out my self perception in relation to events in my life. This picture was taken before I fixed a doily onto one side of it - the doily represents the ever present expectation that I be soft, subtle, quiet, and complacent, not a boat-rocker,  - you know - feminine, nice, Christian .... . I used my purple glue stick to smush glue into the folds and cracks of the doily to get it to stick.  I did it on the top side, so it would show and mess that doily all up. I guess I wasn't feeling very girly and nice that day.

We had a worship Sunday at church. The creative work above was started right in the service.
I love when Communion is part of the church service.  I love seeing how all sorts of different people respond to the sacredness. When I hold the elements in my hand, I see afresh the miracle represented in each one. Each time I take communion is a new conversion, a chance to confess my devotion to Christ and my need for grace.  A chance to reflect on all the ways I am shaped by the God who is present, who is available for communion.

It was my son's 16th birthday recently.  We celebrated at cafe 22, one of our favourite local restaurants. My husband can't turn down an invitation to arm-wrestle our kids' friends.

I spent all day yesterday on one of these... not going to Cleveland, though.  I traversed the Canadian prairies, going into every small town on the highway. A ride that takes less than 6 hours in my car takes 12+ in this beauty.  But I got lots of reading done, and had a $14 lunch (just a sandwich, onion rings, and a coffee!) at a truck stop.

This is my attempt to redeem my photo taking
sklls by making it look like a graphic novel ... I know, I'm just silly.

... after a day on the bus, I was very excited to go for a brisk walk, even though the roads were icy and it was very dark.  Mostly because I wanted to wear my new winter hat!  Or because I had been sitting on a bus all day ....

So, these are a few musings from lately.  I'm still planning to move over to Wordpress because of the comments issue. Maybe I will work on that a bit this week.

PS: This is my little exercise plan for this week.  It takes about 6-7 minutes. I can't seem to find the energy/motivation to exercise in my normal life these days, but away from home I seem to have all kinds of energy to do this!

I'm still doing modified pushups, btw.

thankful

Saturday morning, I heard the sad news that my friend Christina had passed away.  I spent the day rather dishevelled and in a fog.  

Can I tell you a little about Christina?  I know she'd love that her picture is on a blog, and her stories are being told.  She loved being remembered, noticed, appreciated.  

She loved being loved!

I met her in 2009, shortly after our family moved to Flatlanders Inn. She came for our Wednesday potluck. After we'd eaten she asked when the women's prayer group was meeting.  Turns out she thought it was Friday and was looking for another event in the church, she hadn't even meant to come to Flats.... but then she kept coming, every Wednesday night for the next two years.  She'd bring food to share, sometimes chicken nuggets or instant potatoes, but she always wanted to contribute!

Both Christina and I had mothers who had struggled with mental illness and who had passed away many years ago. We discovered this story-in-common early in our friendship.  We hardly ever discussed it, but every so often if the topic of care or childhood would come up, she'd say something about the kind of mutual understanding we shared. Trust grew between us, in the way that it does, winding and testing.  Getting stronger with shared experience, shared laughter, shared hearts, shared hurts. 

 Christina was an artist, and she had this deep longing to communicate brokenness AND hope in every piece she created.
When our artspace opened up, she was became a regular attender at the art drop in. She loved Jesus.  When she was feeling strong, she wanted to pray for you, looking for ways to encourage and bless everyone she met.  When she was feeling low, she asked people to pray for her often.

Christina loved Christian trinkets. She couldn't resist buying a t-shirt or hat that had words or images about love or peace. Her jewellery collection was extensive and included lots of crosses.  If you got curious about the stuff she loved, you'd learn that she just wanted to communicate the love and hope of God to everyone.  She had a mixed up relationship with 'stuff', and it consumed a lot of her energy. ... and often the energy of her friends!   Flatlanders experimented with storing some of her treasures - but in the end, we sent them back to her place because of the tension it brought into our relationship.  

Some of my favourite Christina memories; 

...having coffee in portage place
...sorting through her stuff and hanging clothes on very specific hangers, in very specific order, in a very specific way :)
...rummaging through her purse for some lost item
...the time she made a huge pot of soup for flatlanders and everyone loved it

...being shown a new photo or artistic piece and hearing the story of how it came to be

... the way she would choose an outfit and accessories, usually including a hat!

...seeing the abandon she danced with every sunday in church, even when her arm was injured

I'm pretty sure our last phone conversation was a prayer.  I have guilt over the phone calls I didn't answer and the messages I didn't return, but I know that our friendship was real and mutual - we were honest with each other.  'Be strong' was a phrase said between us often.

Christina gave me a celtic cross from her jewellery collection.  When she was alive, I wore it because I was grateful that she was in my life.  Now that she's gone, I'll wear it in her memory and in thankfulness for all that I learned from her. 

Christina taught me about beauty, about suffering, about joy, about intimacy, about vulnerability, about prayer, about Jesus.

She taught me about Jesus because I saw him in her all the time.

Be at peace, dear Christina, you will be missed by so many.
We love you.

                    ...until we meet again...

summer holidays

Just returned from a fabulous week away with family.  Every summer, myself and my three sisters - and our families, and our dad - rent 3 cabins for a week.  It's so much fun and we make such great memories.  The families are mixed up between the cabins, the cooking and cleaning are assigned so we all get a chance to work together.  We have lots of traditions, tasty food, and fun activities to look forward to every year.  Lisa keeps us organized with a three page spreadsheet about meals and clean up, and Syd usually helps with the shopping.
Here are some photos of our time this year - we tried a new spot this year, Keystone Resort at Westhawk Lake in the Whiteshell.  It was a hit!! (beach volleyball on site, inground pool, ice cream store across the street, and gorgeous sandy beach just a short walk away - what more could you want for a summer vacation?)

Beach Volleyball was a big hit - especially early in the week when Joey and Dustin
 were with us!  Everyone played (even me, ONCE!). 
 It was super fun to watch, too.  
We have quite an entertaining family :)

We hug lots.  We're huggers.

A few of us on an after dinner walk.

Ted and Ally demonstrating dance moves.

The resort pool was part of the daily routine.  
I personally spent two FULL days lounging there. :)

Bren and I walked to Hunt Lake on a really hot afternoon.  
I had to give myself a make-shift shower before turning back for home.

The four girls - next year, April will be in this line-up :)

We had great weather and so much fun.  We need to find a new location next year - ideas, anyone?

poster from departika at etsy.com

We've really discovered this year that there is tremendous value in taking good breaks.  How do you take breaks?  comment and let us know!
Happy Summer,
kelly

summer conversations and holiday pics

here are some pics and an interesting conversation from the last couple of days ... I am up very early anticipating getting Syd from the airport. (and she woke me up with texts and calls from TO at 330am!)


niece: auntie kelly, lets go swimming.
me: OK!
niece: we have to put our bathing suits on first...and our life jackets.
me: K, I'll go change, be right back.
niece: I'm changing in the living room
me: I can see that...
niece: I'm gonna come change with you
(follows me)
niece: so you don't change in front of other grown ups, right?
me: ummm... ya, thats pretty much right.
niece: well, you would change in front of your sisters.
me: ya, I would.
niece: would you change in front of my dad?
me: no.
niece: but uncle brendan - you change in front of him?
me: yes, we're married.
niece: I change in front of anyone in my family.
me: yup...
niece: do you change in front of grandpa?  He's your dad.  He's in your family.
me: ahhhh, ... ummmm, .... Let's race to the dock!


Here's a few shots of our time in Lac Du Bonnet....

Just learned to walk!

 Summer fun!

echoes, phantoms and expectations

Lately, I've been reading and thinking about gender roles/expectations.  I came across some interesting stuff last week... 

Virginia Woolf (1882-1941) was famous for writing,  and later on for speaking up on behalf of women. (and maybe for being a bit unstable...)  She expressed and embodied some of the struggle that was being experienced by the women (and men!) of her day.  Rather than telling you my interpretation of the tension she lived with, here are some of her memoir words, from a lecture in 1931.

'I discovered that ... I should need to do battle with a certain phantom.  And the phantom was a woman... I called her after the heroine of a famous poem,, 'The Angel in the House'.... you who come of a younger and happier generation may have not heard of her... I will describe her... She was intensely sympathetic.  She was immensely charming.  She was utterly unselfish.  She excelled in the difficult arts of family life.  She sacrificed herself daily.  If there was chicken, she took the leg; if there was draught she sat in it - in short she was so constituted that she never had a mind or a wish of her own, but preferred to sympathize always with the minds and wishes of others.  Above all - I need not say it - she was pure. Her purity was supposed to be her chief beauty, her blushes, her great grace.  ... every house had its Angel ... the shadow of her wings (falls) on my page, I (hear) the rustle of her skirts in the room... (she whispers to me) 'my dear, you are a young woman ... be sympathetic; be tender; flatter; deceive; use all the arts and wiles of our sex.  Never let anybody guess that you have a mind of your own.  Above all, be pure'.  ... I now record the one act for which I take some credit to myself ... I turned upon her and caught her by the throat.  I did my best to kill her.  My excuse, if I were to be had up in a court of law, would be that I acted in self defense.  Had I not killed her she would have killed me ... for, as I found, you cannot put pen to paper .. without having a mind of your own, without expressing what you think to be the truth about human relations, morality, sex.  And all these questions, according to the Angel in the House, cannot be dealt with freely and openly by women; they must charm, they must conciliate, they must .. tell lies if they are to succeed.  Thus, whenever I felt the shadow of her wing or the radiance of her halo upon my page, I took up the inkpot and flung it at her.  She died hard.  Her fictitious nature was of great assistance to her.  It is far harder to kill a phantom than a reality.  She was always creeping back when I thought I had despatched her.   - from Woolf's In the Death of the Moth and other Essays.  As quoted by Daniel Levinson in Seasons of a Woman's Life.

Even though we are living in a world that is very different from Woolf's 1931,   I find myself wondering why is Woolf's phantom description still familiar?  

how...?

Just the other day, I was giving my sweet nephew his bath, watching him take his first steps...

..... and then, I blinked.

and he grew up!

So I squeezed him really hard and asked 'where did the time go?'

And I also asked - repeatedly: 'Do you know how proud of you I am?  Like really, really proud of who you are and all the things that make you you?'

And he says, 'umm, yeah, I think I know.'

But I sent him a text or two, just to make sure he wouldn't forget.

No matter what message I send, I always get the same reply... 'LOL'.

I don't remember which birthday this was.

I kinda thought it was only last month or something.

Here's my sister's beautiful family. 

next graduate: my boy.

Everyone keeps asking me: 

if you were such a teary mess when D. graduated, how will you cope when your OWN son graduates (in two years!).

Answer: I was never really good at loving other peoples kids differently than my own.  

Yeah, I know, I'm weird.

But there you have it - another boundary I don't love to cooperate with!  I just love 'em all the same and cry over everyone's accomplishments.

home, unedited

Gypsy Mama does a 5 minute friday routine where she gives a prompt, and we write on the topic for five minutes.
 we don't re-write, re-think, backspace and start over.. we just go. I'm off today, so here's a little try.

 so, here I go... home is today's topic...

my husband and my family are the usual thoughts i have when i think of home.
 that safe embrace. the quiet whispers, the shared memories, the jokes we know, the stories we share.
 the way we can read a look, a feeling, as if it were scrawled in big letters across the ceiling.
 home is safe, or at least its supposed to be.
 home is intimacy, security.
 some houses have been great homes for us, but not all.
 some years have been wonderful for building our 'home' with one another. other years have torn down what was built before.
 experiences have been so important in the shaping of home, too. Many experiences strengthen our home among eachother. Some have weakened it considerably.

 home. sweet. deep. right. .... and hard, achingly so, sometimes.

 ...and - quit. (I did hit backspace a few times.)

 learn more here, scroll to the bottom to participate.

mothering - with confidence

Mothers Day seems to have a weird effect on us.  Some folks love it, others want to hide in a dark room and pretend it doesn't exist.  The feelings we have about mothers day seem to be at least partially tied to the feelings we have about our mothers, and whether we felt let down or failed by them in our youth.

Reading a few blogs this morning provided some interesting reflections.  I liked what Wendy McCaig had to say about being a non-traditional mom.  She recounted how she had a mom that wasn't very normal, and then became a mom that wasn't very normal.  Made me smile, because I've definitely heard my kids say frequently over the years that they wished I was just normal, more like their friends' moms.  Every once in a while though, I get to hear them say that they appreciate me just as I am.  That's nice to hear :)

I had a really nice day with my family yesterday, starting off with a great message in church.  Mike talked about mothering and discipling.  He wrapped up by talking about three important roles moms play in the shaping of their kids futures.

1. Caregiving. (obviously)
2. Dreaming - as in dreaming on behalf of their kids, naming the dreams, sharing the dreams, believing the dreams, holding the dreams up and keeping them alive
3. Inviting their kids to participate in meaningful ways.  I think the jist of this one is that families do things alongside eachother, rather than always instructing; recognizing the unique contributions of kids rather than the capabilities of experienced parents.  I think it has something to do with how we 'belong' in our families.

What about you readers ... do you have a 'normal' mom?  What are your reflections on the day?

mothering

so many times, I have pressed my lips into my kids hair... i've done it since they were small, small.  This is the way we stay connected, I say.  This is the way strength passes between us.  this is how our forever bond keeps going.

so many memories, the small ones that happen in families.  memories over dishes and favorite shows.  memories of favorite meals and favorite books.  memories of teaching and watching, learning and playing.

so many nights,  laying awake and praying, praying for their futures, for who they are becoming, prayingfor their path.

so many ways to say and show 'i love you'.  a look, a smile, a greeting, a touch, a favor, a backrub.

so many ways it aches to be a mom.  Who hurts this child of mine?  Why do they hurt each other, hurt me?  why are the choices so hard, why is the media so loud?

so many roads to feelings of inadequacy.  so many 'supposed tos', so many expectations of mothering.   so many comparisons.

so many tears.  so much joy. so much depth, richness.

the year end post

like lots of bloggers, here is a year end compilation of best-ofs, reflections, hopes, thoughts.. all because of the way we understand the significance of that moment between December 31 and January 1st...

best moments of 2010 -

• the year starting with an engagement as the clock struck 12:01 ... followed by a May wedding at our house! 
• deciding to stay long term at Flats
• starting practicum, moving in the direction of dreams, seeing the fruit of hard work
• San Francisco with the family for 9 wonderful days in July!!
• finding out just how much I can cope with and realizing what is on the other side of getting to the place of NOT being able to cope anymore
• mini escapes retreats - Grand Forks, Vancouver, Kenora, Calgary, Hepburn, even Caronport!
• visiting another intentional community - Sojourners - and learning from their structure/practices
• receiving an indian name in a very moving and memorable way
• watching my husband become a student ... one who loves learning, does well, and is accomplishing goals that he never thought were possible for him
• seeing our kids grow into loving our crazy life and crazy choices - watching them interact and reap the benefits of living in community (and maybe even learn a few of the lessons it teaches....)
• having all sorts of new people move in with us, learning about people in deep and meaningful ways, learning what makes them tick and what makes them hide in their rooms.
• realizing that I might just be an okay therapist someday, and realizing that narrative ideas are a good fit with my values and passion for community.  Sort of like a falling into something by accident and realizing that it maybe wasn't so accidental...
• spending time with nieces and nephews, realizing in every visit the deep joy that is part of these relationships!  ' I yuv ewe, unka-telly' - accompanied by a tight squeeze of little arms around my neck - that has to be my favourite phrase of the year!  

best books I read this year - I love books.  I LOVE books - the paper pages and cover kind that we hold in our hand!  I am saddened by the popularity of Kindle and its cousins because I'm afraid they signal the beginning of the end of real books. Here are a few of the bona fide books I loved flipping the pages of this year - cover to cover, with highlighter in hand!

• Stuart Murray's The Naked Anabaptist
• Katie Funk Wiebe's You Never Gave me a Name (Thanks, Lisa!)
• Hauerwas andVaniers's title in the Duke Reconciliation Series Living Gently in a Violent World
• Jonathan Wilson's (Sr.)  Living Faithfully in a Fragmented World (I also enjoyed a coffee date with Jonathan in Vancouver, accompanied by Jess and Noah!)

treasured learning - 

• both/and not either/or - more on this in a future post, I hope.  Suffice it to say that I am internalizing and gaining insights about the co-existence of apparent extremes, learning about contrasts. Especially, I'm becoming more accepting of their frequency and regularity in all of life ... I'm embracing both/and and letting go of either/or. (I guess this is still on the theme of accepting tension)
• marriage - 2010 was hands down the hardest year of married life we've ever had.  2011 will (we hope) be the year of living out the things we learned and leaving behind the things that need to be left behind.  Enough said.

reflections - 

• 2009 and 2010 were both years that I'm glad to see the back-end of.  Thats a yucky feeling - the inner war between being ungrateful and being honest.
• I'm so grateful for the consistent awareness throughout both years of the amazing gift of family and friends who love and support you through challenging circumstances.   I am so grateful for people like Bren, Lorrie, Paul, Lisa, Ted, Karen, Bry, Andy, Bek, Lori, Warren, Lisa B, Sheryl, Zach, Jeff, Amanda, Carol, Rob, Gloria, Cath, Cynthia, Norma, Bruce, Cory, all the Flats (past and present!) - and many others who have supported, prayed, loved, cared, and encouraged. There are so many people (lots not named!) who consistently show me what it is to be a friend. My life is so rich because of the people in it.   
• I can be honest about the consistent struggle in both years - we haven't been able to find the balance, consistency, or the certainty that we once had - yet we try to have a normal life in its absence. Here's to hoping that 2011 is the year of renewed stability. 

looking forward to in 2011 - 

• internship - as I write this, three possibilities for internship are yet to be sifted through and decided upon.  
• more time with friends - we realize that much of our life is taken up with community living stuff, and then there's the business of making ends meet and having time as a couple or as a family... there's precious little left over!  We are both resolving to spend more time with our amazing friends and family in 2011.

Here is some of what we've been up to while taking a break from blogging...

Lots of fun at Bren's parent's pool...

I saw TJ examining this garden statue.  He clearly loved it.. so I asked if he wanted a picture with it.

He just posed like that .. with very little coaching!

Sweet nephew turning THREE!

A whole day in the hospital .. waiting for another new baby!

And - April Henriette.  Born on August 30, just after midnight. 

I was very thankful for a safe and easy delivery.. and another chance to be a labor coach!

(I just put doula school on my list of things to do in this lifetime...)

May I say that my sister is an amazing mom and gives birth like its as easy as pie and natural as breathing?  Well, I just did.

Spending some time with the kids after their new sister came home..  a painting night!

This one was enhanced by Auntie Kelly a wee bit after Haily went to bed...

the kids went back to school, and so did the husband!

Our green space is GREEN!

Someone very wonderful offered us the use of a cabin for a few days.. but the kids ended up not wanting to go.  So, I went on a little retreat!  Surrounded by artmaking stuffs, books, magazines, and foods I love to eat!

My memere has been in the hospital since Aug. 25th.  The doctors called us to her bedside on two occasions, but she appears to be pulling through.  A fall caused swelling and brain injury, and she refused surgery to alleviate the pressure fearing brain damage.  The only explanation for her continued improvement is "It's a miracle - can only be explained by all the prayers and family support!"  Hmm.

I started a journal page in my daughter's journal with the title 'You come from a line of very strong women .."  Memere has again been showing incredible strength and courage.

... so that's it.  A photo post of what's been going on lately.

we are indeed...

.... in San Francisco!

...and, yes, we will leave our hearts here! 

(cheese, anyone?)